Humor for St. Patrick’s!

Am taking Corned beef and cabbage, potatoes and carrots and onions to my friends’ tonight….I can hardly wait until the house is filled with the aromas, which will be most of the afternoon as it takes a few hours to cook.  Knowing I’ll be smelling and then eating that delicious stuff makes me really happy!  Of course, they don’t eat Corned Beef and Cabbage in Ireland, but what the heck!?  WE DO!

corned beef

So, I thought we all needed a little laugh and decided to publish these…which are truly ‘little’ laughs but some aren’t too bad 🙂  ENJOY!  And Happy St Patrick’s!

st patricks

#1 – Did you hear about the new Obama Diet? You let Putin eat your lunch every day.

#2 – How does Obama win the war on terror? He renames it!  Its now the overseas contingency operation.

#3 – Did you hear about the reporter who asked Obama a hard question? Neither have we!

#4 – How many democrats does it take to change a light bulb?  5! Al Gore to insure it’s a CFL, an EPA agent in case the bulb breaks and a mercury cleanup is necessary, a person to bail out the home owner, an ACORN member to ensure that the right person changed the bulb, and a member of the media to celebrate the change.

#5 – Why can’t Obama dance? Cause he has two leftist feet.

#6 – Some Republicans are saying that due to his current scandals, President Obama should be impeached. In response, Obama laughed and said, ‘Two words fellas: President Biden.’

#7 – What do Obama and financial scam artists have in common? They both say “yes we can,” they both give hope, they both take your money, and they both will leave you penniless in the end.

#8 – Speaker Nancy Pelosi is in Shanghai to debate climate change with Chinese government officials. I think she’ll do fine. These negotiations always come down to whoever blinks first.

#9 – How many Democrats does it take to change a light bulb? It’s irrelevant; they still don’t know they’re in the dark!

#10 – They say that Christopher Columbus was the first Democrat. When he left to discover America, he didn’t know where he was going. When he got there he didn’t know where he was. And it was all done on a government grant.

#11 – What do you get when you offer a liberal a penny for his thoughts? Change.

#12 – What’s the difference between Bill Clinton and government bonds? Government bonds will mature someday.

#13 – What do you call a basement full of liberals? A whine cellar.

#14 – Nancy Pelosi has now been elected the new House minority leader. She was smiling from ear to ear, which is pretty impressive considering how far her ears have been pulled back.

#15 – What kind of doctor do you need to fix Obamacare? A URLologist.

#16 – What’s Obama’s new slogan in these tough times? Spare Change You Can Believe In!

#17 – On #CyberMonday, you can buy anything online. And by “anything,” I mean anything but health insurance.

Barely cracked a smile, right?  Well, they’re better than yet another Obama scandal that leaves us feeling so impotent and angry!

Friends from across the street left me the blessing of a Shamrock plant and card on my doorstep….it’s the prettiest plant!  Do it for someone you love!

shamrocks

Enjoy the day!  Eat some corned beef!
Z

 

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23 Responses to Humor for St. Patrick’s!

  1. Imp says:

    I like them all….great lines Z.

  2. Silverlady says:

    If it was the 19th century & Bampot was white he’s be driving a miracle cure medicine wagon through the hinterlands selling his wonderful elixir to the gullible local yokels. After all, isn’t that what he’s doing today with Bampot phones, faux health care, immigration bypass for the illegals, etc., etc.

  3. Baysider says:

    What a great morning humor – especially 1, 3, and 12. This is making Mr. B hungry! We were away for a few days and SPD fell off my radar. I love corning my own brisket, and didn’t get it started in time.

  4. I enjoyed them all, Z. Also, we both love corn beef and cabbage, but rarely get to eat it. Maybe this is a good time to take a wife out to dinner at our local Irish Pub? Add a big mug of suds, too!

  5. Silverlady says:

    Just in case you don’t already know this, but you probably do, the best way to let the flavors go into the corned beef is to let it cool in the cooking water after it is fork tender. Found that out by accident when I had to leave the house after cooking, but before taking the meat out. I corn my own because I don’t like fat, so use rump instead of brisket. Eye of the round is too dry. Also, i put 1 habanero pepper in the corning mixture, & 1 in the cooking liquid., & lots & LOTS of garlic. No vampires in my house.

  6. Kid says:

    I can smell it already Z. Enjoy the dinner. And the Irish can cook up some really great food. I wish we had a good place in Cincy to go to, but all you need to know about that is Triple D has been here twice – once for an overpriced bad service burger joint and the 2nd time for a ‘Chili’ place that isn’t anything more in Cincy than spaghetti with flavored ground beef on it and some shredded cheddar. Good thing my wife can cook !

  7. Imp says:

    KID…I was told long ago that Paddy can only cook potatoes and Guinness?

  8. Kid says:

    IMP, They cook a great steak and I’ve always enjoyed anything I’ve had at an Irish place. Reasonable price too.

  9. cube says:

    Corned beef and cabbage sounds yummy, but we’re in getting-the- house ready for the arrival of my in-laws (Armenian-American mother and Christian Lebanese-American father) tomorrow. Our youngest is turning 21 on Wednesday and, because it is her choice, we’ll all be going to a restaurant. Tonight, we’ll forage… and clean the house… thoroughly.

  10. geeez2014 says:

    I absolutely LOVE corned beef and am more than satisfied with my results, but I do thank you all for the input! SilverLady…nearly every meat needs to sit, doesn’t it…….

    Cube….Love the ARMENIAN part 🙂 As you know! HAPPY BIRTHDAY to your 21 year old! Say PAREV to your Mom-in-Law! I hope she cooks something Armenian for you!

    Imp; Brit and Irish chefs from the past were pretty unexciting. Believe it or not, that’s changed BIG TIME and some of the BEST chefs in the world are coming from Ireland. You never got much past a boiled beef and potatoes in England but now it’s fabulous. The Irish cheeses, fishes, lambs, etc., are top notch. I love a good bangers and mash! We have a nice Irish pub nearby (Baysider, it’s O’Sullivans) and the British King’s Head Pub is DELICIOUS.

    Kid, how popular is that Cincy spaghetti with chili and cheese on it?

    Mal; considering the crowds tonight, I’d wait 🙂

  11. Kid says:

    Z, I it very popular with the locals Here is the Skyline version – http://www.skylinechili.com/ways.php
    And their competition is Gold Star Chili, which is pretty much the same thing.

    Pretty boring. You could say it’s Ok comfort food, but there is nothing at all special about it and it just isn’t “Chili” to me.

  12. fredd says:

    A one-legged pirate with a parrot on his shoulder, a rabbi and Obama walk into a bar. No, wait….the pirate has both legs but the rabbi is one-legged. And they walk into this bar, and the barkeeper asks….wait, the parrot walks in first. OK. Anyway, the parrot says, er, I mean, the barkeeper says, ‘haven’t I seen you guys in here before?” No, it was the parrot that speaks, and the rabbi doesn’t come into the bar for religious reasons. Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah. And then Obama says “can’t I just finish my waffle?”, No wait, it didn’t go like that. It was the parrot who said….

    Stop me if you’ve heard this one before. It needs a little work, and I know I need some new material…..I’ll be here all week (finishing this lame gag). Good thing this is not my day job.

  13. Crowds are a good point to consider, Z. If its too bad one place, we can check another. We have so many choices of places to eat, all within a mile, we should be able to find one not too busy. We also have a local Hotel/Casino we can walk to that has a half dozen places to eat, but also several Pubs, plus a Chili’s (2 miles) and Mimi’s (6 miles) via freeway.

  14. Kid says:

    Too Implausible anyway Fredd. obama is deathly afraid of rabbi’s, parrots, and pirates.

  15. geeez2014 says:

    Kid, a blogger, Brooke, once sent me different cans of Chili from Cincy….they were just okay. You’re right, it’s really not CHLI as we know it…but I kind of like regional things and so it was fun to eat what Ohioans eat, you know?

    fredd! WHAT? You are NO Henny Youngman :-)!! How are you on corned beef and cabbage!?
    I like waffles too much to consider Obama and waffles in the same sentence!!

    Mal…have a good dinner! I hope you find some corned beef!

    Am watching Israeli news, LIVE, here: http://www.i24news.tv/en/tv/live
    Sadly, they’re saying we might not know who won for a couple of weeks. I hope that’s just liberal media wishful thinking from Israel…it’s VERY close.

  16. Imp says:

    Z…maybe we can send BiBi the votes that the illegals and the dead cast for Ovomit in the last election? We should want to help him out and put our frauds to good use?

  17. geeez2014 says:

    Good idea, Imp!~

  18. cube says:

    I will definitely say Parev to my m-i-l, but I don’t want the poor thing to cook on her vacation. She’s already graced us with homemade choreg (sp?) and store bought lahmajun (sp?) and that’s plenty good. Hubby already made grape leaves and they heat up well so it should be a relaxed, low-key visit focused on our grown up girl. We’ve both been reliving the day of her birth 21 years ago.

  19. geeez2014 says:

    Cube…I’d say those are REALLY good spellings…nice job! And your husband makes the grape leaves with lamb? MMMM Mom makes the best cold grape leaves ever, with rice and onions inside…
    Lovely to relive the birth of your daughter….have a great time!

  20. geeez2014 says:

    Cube…by the way, warm choereg with string cheese. That veryslightly ‘sweet’ thing in the choereg with the salty cheese ROCKS!
    Just sayin’ !!
    mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

  21. The Odars won’t understand choereg, Z. :- )

  22. cube says:

    Thank you for heads up on the spelling. I always think I’m getting it wrong and I love the kudos as to spelling. It’s not my language, but I do my best. No, not lamb, but ground beef. I’ve never had it, but I’d love to try the lamb version. I’m going to get with hubby about the next time.

    I love choereg as is, but my husband likes to bake them in the oven for a bit and then slather them with butter. Go figure. I will definitely tell him about the string cheese. I’m sure he’ll love it.

  23. Speaking of Lamb, Cube, did you know there are no carcinogens in Lamb? I believe it is the only red meat that doesn’t. That makes it a much healthier alternative.

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